3 Months. 3 Weeks. 3 Days. 3 Hours. 3 Minutes. 3 Seconds.

Hey yawl!!!

It's been a LONG ass time since I talked to my luv muffins ^.^. So ALOT has happened over the past 3 months haha. But imma try to keep thangs short and sweet. And make this post interesting, exciting, mind-boggling, & ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!!! (⌒▽⌒)



Sooo...um, last time I posted was right before my birthday. May 16 (had to go check that myself lmao). So if u didn't already know... I got my tongue and nose pierced ^.^ on May 13. Week before my birthday. It didn't hurt a bit am I'm happy to have both of them; even tho I say that the nose ring was a bad idea after all the times I snatched it out >_

Well as for my birthday. My DAY. it wa the worse fuckin birthday I've EVER HAD IN MY 23YRS OF LIFETIME T_T fuckin bill collector fucked it up saying I got money for my birthday that I could give to them or gifts I can go RESELL to give the money to them. Like WTF. What's funny bout these bill collectors. They threaten u sayin they're gonna fuck up ur credit while bitchin they want a cool SEVERAL THOUSANDS as payments. But here's the catch with a fucked up credit score u can't get a JOB!!!! ！(◎_◎;) SOOOO how I'm fin to get a job an pay you if yawl fuck wit my credit which makes the employers say OH HELL NAW!!! So yea wasn't a good birthday.

So May was pretty suckie for me.

JUNE!!

Well my friend insisted that I go back to school. And I am. It's called Bidwell Training Center. You can go for free if your a PA resisdent. All expenses paid and waved and all that goodness lol. So I'm taking up OFFICE TECHNOLOGY. It's a 5 month program from October to March and I graduate April 2011. ^.^ total plus rite??? WRONG!!!!! T_T so after u go to an information session & take the placement test (which I passed) u have to have an interview with the director of the program. & I'll get to that in a minute too.

So!! I had this friend who I consider a sister to me. Ya kno I was always there for her did everything for her. So long story short. Me being nice I buy her sum clothes then she got outta hand wantin to buy up the whole fuckin STORE T_T!!!! Spending THOUSANDS. Smh. So me and my homegirl tryna help her out get her to do sumtin constructive wit her life. So we called her all weekend long so she can go to Bidwell and she says ok. We didn't hear from her until the day of the information session like I'm ready to go. Ms. Kitten (my homegirl) tells her well it's 8:30am we don't have time to make it at 9. But we'll take you to a few places & apply for jobs. And she told her that I'd call her. So 12:30 rolls around and I'm up & red to go and I call her. She has this pissy ass funky ass attitude and after her convo she hangs up on me. Which pissed me off for the 2nd time coz before we took her to the amusement park and she acted a complete ass. Then had the nerve to say I have a tummy ache and a headache but the bish (excuse my French) wanted fuckin cotton candy cheesecake ice cream funnel cake all that shit. WTF if ur stomach hurts?? So I stop talking to her all together.


JULY!!!! *does air guitar riff* >_< ...... O_O *ahem* o_o anywayz


So I stop talkin to the crazy girl and did me. Coz I was tired of help someone that didn't want to help herself ya kno what I'm sayin?? So her main excuse was how her bf felt. But like look.... IDC that she has a bf that doesn't phase me. It's the fact you want to act like he's the best thing since toasters when I'm taking care of ur ASS!!! *ahem* so. I did me. Went to school for my placement tests and I passed with flying colours *hehe* and ribbons an all that goodness (⌒▽⌒). So I had an interview with the director of my major on July 29th. So I'm excited getting ready for that day. Got burncha clothes just in case coz I wanted to look nice!!! Even bot new earrings so I look presentable ^.^. Well I go. One I missed one bus so I said to myself the busway will get me there quicker right?? Wrong took me a whole hour -_- which made me HELLA LATE =(. So it took me 4 calls before I could get anyone to tell them I was having transportation problems rite. So when I finally get there I had to wait another hour. Around 9:45a it was my turn. So we gonna make this short. This lady jumps on my ass like I robbed 10 banks within the past 10 hours....she didn't like what I was wearing ALLL MY PIERCINGS were offensive my shoes were acceptable either blah blah blah so I walk away there pissed. Coz she judged me coz I was late because of the fuckin bus system *slaps forehead* So I need retainers for my piercings and a bracelet or sumtin for my tattoo on my left wrist (yea it's been awhile lol). Smh right??


So the 30th I decided to go out coz I was still pissed over that fucked up issue -_-. So I go to the nail shop around 2ish-3ish. So the 28th I finally talk to the crazy girl after a good month. And so I asked her if she wanted to spend time wit me. Ya kno I'm bein nice tryin to make our friendship work. So Friday the 30th. She comes to nail shop I pay for my nails & toes & her toes. So I had to go to the waterfront to pick up a few things. I stopped at the connivence store to get me a drink and this bish says to me that her BF SAYS I HAVE TO BUY PAMPERS AND BABY SHIT FOR THEIR BABY COZ HE SAYS SO. Look this bush grabs a cart I'm like o ain't BUYIN SHIT!! T_T PUT THAT SHIT BACK PUT IT DOWN DAMMIT. So we leave and she has an attitude or whatev and I couldn't do the waterfront that day.


The 31st of July.

So me & the Velvette Kitty is on our way to the waterfront to have a movie day or whatev. So crazy sends me a text message. And u kno the hello hey how u what's new convo or whatev. So I ask her what u doin today she's like haven family time wit the bf & the baby at the waterfront. I'm like oh ok that's nice. So we're at the movie theater & we bot our tickets so we went & grab a bite to eat. So Kitty wanted to say hello to her coz Kittys been workin and haven't had much time. So she says the bf won't let her tell US where they are. And we went back & forth so she leaves this voicemail & her Lil punk ass bf is draggin MY NAME THRU THE FUCKIN SHIT PUDDLE!!! Piss me off so it's like 10ish I tell her to tell him to stay where he at coz I'm comin to see him. He's getting smart and shit so when I find his punk ass I cussed him the FUCK OUT!!! But before I did that I was lady like and called & asked WTF the prob was. He goes in this stupid act & it pissed me off and then the Lil bitch HUNG UP ON ME!!!! THATS A NO NO WHEN U TALKIN TO BUNNY T_<.

So I call her and she's in a dumb act to and it pissed me off. And her excuse is that coz he's the fiancé she obligated to him. I'm obligated to piss in the morning WTF's ur point?? I was mad at her coz one she wanna be like how u gonna let *HIM* come between us like it's my fault & my dude. Then she's like well I'm just telling u how he feels. He's mad coz u all talk bout him behind his back. Well he ain't doin shit for u. Ur in a "transitional housing" & he's in a house living Scott free WTF that's not love. So I'm arguin wit her and him. So by time 1130 rolls around I'm still arguin wit her and she hangs up on me. She calls me 2 seconds later like my fone died. Yea I bet it did. So I was like fuck her fuck him fuck their issues I don't need.



AUGUST...... T_T

So August 1st. She's blown my cell up BIG TIME. Talkin all stupid an shit so it was a HUGE ASS FIGHT. It included me Kitty, my mother & her & him. So in the end nothing really got accomplished. Well except that they felt that it's my responsibility to take care o their baby ..... Which it's not. But I'm not gonna allow you to kick me in my ass for no reason coz you feel it's right. That's BULLSHIT!!!

So all together I stop talking to her........AGAIN. The time before she played me to the left.


WHICH BRINGS US TO YESTERDAY THE 15th of August.

Now I haven't had a real convo wit her in a minute. So she sends me
This IM like Hi there. Would it be possible for you to watch our son today. O_o! WHAT!? T_T. I told her no. 1 coz I have a cold (cot it the Wednesdays before got cot in a rain storm =p) & 2 u knew wt u wanted to do last week. WTF?? So she gets a tude & says well u wanted to before what's changed?? I mean, u claim him as ur nephew, so......??

I'm like look I don't claim him no more. It's for the best for all of us. No I am not watching ur kid u knew WTF u wanted to do today last week. 3 i have things to do in the morning and I'm not leaving ur baby with my mother since U 2 don't get along ok. So no she couldn't accept that she pops another tude and calls my fone 7 times last nite sayin how I'm being petty and how what happened 2weeks ago wasn't a big thing. So I argued wit her for a minute. And she's like u need to be a woman and call me. I'm like I have a fuckin COLD & A SORE THROAT WTF I'm not gonna waste what lil voice I got on arguing with u. So then she's like well if u have a prob wit my bf u talk to him. Which is how we all got to that fucked up weekend in the first place. I'm like WTF does that you kno??


1. It's not my place to talk to ur bf thats ur job.

2. He ain't got NO SAY in WTF I do on my spare fuckin time or any other time.

3. If u really wanted to be my friend my bff my sister NONE OF THIS WOULDA HAPPENED am I right or am I wrong???



So at this point in time I'm TOO THRU wit her & her punk ass bf. I got my own issues ya kno what I'm sayin?? And right I'm trying my damnest and hardest to make my life right and if ppl don't want to help a chick out.... That's COOL NO PROB. I mean hey OH WELL. But I'mma keep it movin ya kno what I'm sayin



So wit that shit said!!

HAPPY AUGUST YAWL

& yes

The

Bitch

is

BACK

(⌒▽⌒)

CTFUUUUUUUU!!!!


3 kizz, 2 hugz, 1 luv (^з^)-♡



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

"Random Sex Thought"

I can't wait to see him today
As I drive over pick him up from work
I wait till I see his smiling face
As he pokes his head thru the window
To kiss my cheek; as he traces my jaw line
With his hands
He creeps over to the passenger seat
As he takes his seat
He looks at me
& I ask, 'Baby how was work today?'
He just smiles & chuckles
I start the engine
He shifts in his seat
Before I could shift gears
He runs his hand over my ripped jeans
Like he's playin a guitar
As he aims a Lil higher
Just to feel my treats
He whispered, 'Lets go sum place quiet bae'
I smiled & kissed his cheek
& said, 'But first.... Get ya ass in the back seat...'


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

"That Special Someone"

Dear Life,

I want that someone who'll take me to the Movies
A Play or two
The Opera, even if we both fall asleep
Someone who'll hold my Hand in Public
Not thinking nothing of it
Someone to take my sorrow & pain away
Someone who makes me happy
They have to care for me
Accept me for who I am
No they don't have to say "I Luv U" all the time
But their hug & kiss will let me know they're forever mine
I want to have Someone that I have more than "things in common"
I want our hearts to be in Common
Trust me I'll take good care of them
Give them all the luv I have to hold
All the support & cheer ups never told
I'll be there for them
If they'll be there for me


Life, if you do this one thing for me...

I know promise to never ask for anything else again.


Luv,

Bunny


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

"Ain't No Sunshine"

The daylight gives me the best fight
The moonlight gives me the hardest fright
But it's only him; The one who always breaks my heart
Even this emptiness can't fulfill the longing
Yea it's only him; The one who always makes me frown
I'm at my happiest when he leaves me
But—then again...
Ain't no sunshine when he's gone, gone, gone
Ain't no sunshine when he's gone, gone, gone
Ands it seems like he's never comin back home...




- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

+*¨^¨*+(Wicked Midnight Series)+*¨^¨*+

"Wicked Midnight"

I've given up
If it's not meant to be
Then I'mma let it be
Wicked Midnight, here I come
Catch Me—


"Wicked Midnight vol. 2"

I am Queen of the Wicked Midnight
You remember that nightmare from last night
Enjoy it—Cause it was your last fight


"Wicked Rain"

It's dark & gloomy outside
But I crave for darkness
I like this blindfold...
I love to hide


"Wicked Love"

When it comes to him
We always bicker, fight & argue
May even make each other mad
But in the end...
He warms this Glass Heart of Mine

(Wicked Midnight Series 2)

(Wicked Midnight Series 3)

"Coloring"

I color to keep my sanity
I color to keep me happy
I color to keep from getting angry
I color to keep from striking my heart—deadly


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

What Ive been Doin ^_^

Hey May | Adieu Avril

So lot of >broken promises< huh?? I kno I kno....had my PLATE a lil too full, I do believe and now that it's empty....I'm actually at a lost for words, or even better, as to what to truly say...


So I had said it's going to be DIY month & was gonna explain the new TAGS & LABELS and I was gonna do this and I was gonna do that, so on and so forth but I didn't. It seemed like April just FLEW the hell by me and even tho I was excited for May to come (coz of the bday) it seemed like I was preoccupied with something else what?? I have no clue or an idea. All I know is that, well....

Lemme start from the beginning.

So besides my mother always on my ass & us never seeing eye to eye. I still had to get her a bday present and mother day present and I did so. But even when I try my best to be a good daughter it's always looked upon as a "suck-up" or a "brown nosing kiss ass". But that's not the case and whateve can't you can't change ppl to your liking rite and unfortunately I wish that was a rule we all as human beings could live by (=..=). Anywayz Im sitting here looking at my life like is it even worth finishing school up?? Attempting to make it work so I can be that better successful more independent person that I'd hope would mold me into THAT WOMAN ya kno??

After a few back an forths with my so called school. I started thinking again like WTF is up with this school that I never get a response back or when I do get one it's like a lil kid was sending out mock emails or something, ya kno?? So you kno me I started googling my lil ass off trying to figure out what was up wit this school.......found nothing but NEGATIVITY—GOTS to be KIDDIN ME??? (rite?? WRONG!!). So I come to find out that the school is unaccredited and basically I was just doin this for FUN (>_<) talk about someone LIVID [2 degrees past PISSED]!!!!! So I quit the school I had in the mean time, been looking at online schools sayin to myself 'Oh I'll give it another SHOT *clicks tongue*' I had more DUDS & Scams intended to have!! I didn't find shit!! Found one school but $40000 is outta the question (plus that's 2times my debt [+_+]).


Which leads to now—The PREZANT....I tried thinking of ways to correct this but I'm plum outta ideas & thoughts. So then I resorted back to my bad thoughts. And I said to myself it is an >option< no lie but do I really & truly want to go thru with it?? What about my birthday. What about my pictures and poems I've yet to publish or show to the world?? But then again would anyone care about Ms. LéRue??



Now for a LONG time now I've been havin these weird blank dreams last real dream I had actually had to be way before thanksgiving maybe even as far back as Halloween. But I had a dream Thursday night. My mother & I had been arguing over something petty as usual. & I went to bed mad that night disgusted. Nothing unusual tho.

The dream I had was about my dad. At the beginning of the dream it was wintery like. My dad had taken me to the store to get something. & he was outside waiting for me. There he was with those olive green corduroy pants he always liked to wear with those tan colored boots. His dark brown winter coat and that ugly hat he loved *lol*. He was outside with my mother talking to my cousin. Later on in the dream we were at this place a restuarant type of place. It was a wonderful sun shiny day full of happiness. There were these tables & benches like the ones at bistro or amusement park. The ones where the umbrella pops up in the middle of it?? These were a lemon chiffon typa yellow. We sat there happy as my dad pulled out this present bag. You know the ones you stick the gifts in and give to people. And my dad pulled out a baseball cap (fitted) it was black red & yellow he gave it to my mother. Then he took out this gray rasta beanie that had a duck bill to it. It wasn't my thing or my style but it made me happy because it was from >Him<. Even though I couldn't hear anything I could see the happy wonderful conversation happening. Then my dad looked at me and said, "Saun, look over there.' Happily I turned my head thinking I would find something exciting or maybe it was a joke. All I saw was more sunshine and what seemed like to be a little garden of flowers. But when I looked back my father was gone. My mother was gone. My world started going all dark full of gray and black. My feelings were to think I was tricked into seeing my father. But even worse I was teased into thinking I could keep him. As I sat there trying to push back tears I couldn't help but notice something. It was a little girl sitting in a stroller. She was a pretty little girl. With the brightest eyes I've ever seen, too mesmorizing to be real. As she sat there and stared at me, I couldn't help but stare back. Then she tilted her head and said, "Mama." I cracked my eyes open because I knew there was no way she was mine. She couldn't be, and I didn't want her to be. I won't allow it. I forbid her to be my daughter.


But...

All of that has been on my mind. That little girls face is plaguing my mind. Last night's dream was like a 5 second clip but whoever he was, he called me by a different name...but I did answer. He seemed so distance like a stranger I've never met. Yet he felt so familiar, even more so when he held like we had been lovers since a past life. That one got interupted when I got woken up.

It was strange quite honestly. Neither of the dreams make since to me, especially now since it had been so long since I had a normal nights dream. But also too it's not the first time I had a dream about my so called future children. Yes children a few times were about boys or a boy & a girl or my being pregnant. But this time it was weird it felt to real and hit home a little too much for me. I don't know.



But that was April rite??? But why would drag over to May you ask?? Hmmph I been asking myself the same question. Even tho it happened to mess up my groove. I was happy but then it made me think. May's coming and I've been home for a year I've had nothing but hard bad luck and horrible consequences. What am I going to do with myself?? I'm broke, educated but lacking a paper (=..=) and I'm extremely unhappy. But talking to certain people they don't know what it's truly like to hurt and to remain that way.

Currently I'm hoping that maybe at least I'll be able to get a break to have someone say, "Well well let's give her a try she seem like she has a lot of talent & a lot of possibilities" *lol* that would make me (^_^) happy. But also I can't have what I want. But ido have a feelings that those dreams that I had.....are telling me what *I NEED* and then again maybe it's something that I've never consider that I can't place my finger on....that I'll soon learn about.


But either way, I've decided that I have a story to write & I'm going to call it: The Daughter with the Heart made of Broken Glass ......so look for that as well as keep looking for the Labels Meanings Posts & a few others. I'm going thru a rough time but since I have a few of you that are >devoted< (^_^) I truly appreciate it and I'm going to keep writing ok?? Just BARE wit Wish and like I said:


Just like your music on Shuffle I'll give you The Best Unpredictably ;D




xღxღxღ,

Wish



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Erene's My Current Project :)

Nature & Lil Theo ^_^