Welcome To StepMommyhood

So because life will always have a plot twist things will always change or never be what they seem. 

With that being said. I decided to take time out to get this off my mind. 

So I know I've said it time and time again that I would never date a man with kids ever again. I would say that line until I'm blue & purple in the face. Why? Because I "dated" or (what is known in my generation as) hooked up with men before who were dads. Now they weren't father of the year. Some were decent fathers, some were down right horrible. Others just wanted to have their dessert buffet (variety of women) with no commitments to anyone really. I've even been put in the position where I too was forced to ride the coat tail or apron strings of the Baby Mama because he demanded that from me because I wanted to be in a relationship with him. So that meant whatever the baby mama said—went. No questions asked. And I better not oppose this position. So not only was I coming in second to a woman who hated my very existence. But I was back burner to possibly another baby mama and the children involved. So that second or third place was now down to a strong 13th place. I personally didn't like it. And realized the more time I invested with men who had kids the less contented I was with the situation. 

Now I remember when my parents would talk about life and whatnots. My dad always said he would never date or marry a woman who had a kid or kids. He never liked ready made families. My mom on the other hand was ok with it. She said you can't blame the kids on your relationship with that parent. Especially if you care about that person a lot. When I was teen I got her point of view. And agreed. But then I grew up and dealt with it. And then understood where my dad was coming from. I decided around 22 or 23 I would never date a man with kids. Kids were a deal breaker and always would be. Whether it was mutual or he had full custody. It didn't matter I didn't want to have to compete for a man's attention amongst people who win his affection by default. I don't like rigged races or relationships. 

But then a plot twist happened. I met my boyfriend. We met unexpectedly. We became friends first. Talking here and there and did different hangouts. We just were buddies. I was contented with that. Especially after a realization that my ex was wasting my time and love for no reason. I didn't want to jump into something because my emotions were hurting and aching to be relieved and built back up. 

Now the more time I spent with him. I eventually figured out he had kids. It took him awhile to tell me he had kids. 3 kids; 2 boys and a girl. But he had that daddy material about him. Which I'll admit that I find attractive. Just something about a guy being fatherly and doing it because he wants to not because he's forced or wants something to brag about or have a good reputation. When we finally went on our first date which was nice at my favorite place. Around that time is when I started liking him a lot! Before I knew it k found myself falling in love with him. 

Now it wasn't planned. Honestly, you couldn't have told that 25year old me that I would be dating a single dad by time I'm 30. That would be unfeasible to me. I would call you a nut job and bid thee good day. However plot twists happen! Here I am a year later still toughing it out with him. 

Now I haven't met the kids. And before you spazz on me and say I should've met them months ago. Hear me out. I know from my childhood experiences that change sucks. It makes no sense. Sometimes adult situations make no sense. My parents celebrating their anniversary was a pain to me. But so important to them. It never made sense until I got older unfortunately and neither of them are here. So for me to be forced on the kids abruptly and for them to expected to love and accept me is wrong. Me and their dad want our relationship to work. We want it to be long term and serious. We want to get married. We want to raise and have a family together. But, first we have to make sure we can withstand the challenges of a relationship. We just had a first major fight that would've caused us to break up. Now if I met the kids months ago and we for attached to each their and then abruptly I'm no longer in the picture that's more of a strain on them than me. Kids are sensitive and change is a BIGGER deal to them than it is to an adult. For most of us we don't like change and we need time to adjust. Sometimes it works out for the better sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes it requires more adjustments to offset the fuck up that happened. 

Now within this. I myself is adjusting to change. I'm treading in uncharted waters. I've never made it this far in a relationship, let alone with someone that I truly do care about and love with all my heart. So I'm adjusting being a girlfriend myself. With pressures of that, being a stepmom so quickly and abruptly would be too stressful on me. I'm aware of them as I'm sure they're aware of me. But we still need time to adjust. Eventually yes I'll meet the kids. I have faith it'll all work out. Nothing in life is perfect. There's always going to be trials and tribulations. But first we have to make sure our relationship is solid and made to last. Before we include the kids. 

Like lately people have told me I need to reconsider my options. I can do so much better than a single dad with THREE KIDS!! He's no good for me and all this nonsense. But I realized something this one jag off of a dad told me a few years back. He said I wasn't getting any younger and I had to learn to accept that men come with kids. I told him I did accept it, but it meant I didn't have to participate if I didn't want to. I'm like on the edge of my 20s. Like my age right now is a season cliffhanger lol. Me finding a 30 year old man with no kids, a job and a personality that I can tolerate who isn't a complete asshole is like you getting a $500 bonus in your check every month. Yeah if it happens it's going to come with terms and conditions. 

I'll be straight with you guys. I have never come across a man like him. He buys me groceries, cooks me dinner and even will clean up and mow the lawn. He'll even make sure I have gas in my car to get to and from work. He's so good to me. I never had any guy treat me as good as he does. I can be myself around him and feel comfortable. I don't have to be someone I'm not or go above and beyond to impress him. I enjoy our date nights at home where we laugh, watch movies, eat good food and enjoy each other's company. In the whole time we've been together we've only had sex once. So it's not about sex or what he can get from me or what I can get from him. First and foremost he's my best friend and always will be. I'm glad he is. Unfortunately with our first time there's a possibility that I may be pregnant. So that's another thing we got to deal with too. 

Now I'm not going to sugar coat it and say that all single dads are like him or that a man will be a childless single woman like me. But I will say change happens. Plot twists even happen. I felt I would met a guy that was compatible with my lifestyle and it would just work. But honestly it would never work. Because that wasn't compatible with what I needed or wanted or what was best for my heart and wellbeing. With that crazy plot twist. I found a good thing. I believe he's the best thing that's ever happen to me. And I can't wait to see what else happens. He adds excitement to my life that I'll say that I don't want to share. I'm real selfish with my love for him. I also get jealous about him too lol. So I find myself doing a lot of things that I never would've considered. And he also brings out the better side of me too and I appreciate that. 

So no he isn't perfect. Yes he has kids. Yes there's a baby mama. But it can work if you have faith and believe that it can. Will it be easy?? Hell no. But that's life. If it's easy, it's worth isn't very valuable now is it?? 

Now of course I'll keep you guys updated on life dating a single dad, and life into StepMommyhood and if it turns out I'm pregnant too, my road to mommyhood too! I'm sure I'll be seeing TONS of plot twists too. 

I Am NOT Dehydrated

You know. Honestly after this week I've fucking had it with men. They're so fucking retarded anymore it's not even funny. 

I'm tired of men assuming I'm "Thirsty" for attention. Dude no I'm not. I don't have a need for a dude and I'm so far from interested you got me so fucked up you need to go back to school and learn some shit. I don't care what it is! Learn something. 

Between the attitude of these wannabe aggressive men to the tons (and I do mean tons) of dick pics and cumshot pics. To even the attitude when I say I'm not interested. Like dude why would I be? You refer to every female as a thot, a bitch, a whore, she's thirsty, and disrespect her like she has to accept your dick. You have tons of kids by several different women and probably one on the way. You're selfish, rude, inconsiderate and have no manners or etiquette of whatsoever. But then get mad because I don't take you seriously?? Why should I?? You're already marketing yourself off as a top class clown. Why would I take you seriously?? 

I'm just tired of the extra crap. Like my plate is already full with stress with trying pay bills and get a better life for myself and hopefully invest in a better future. It doesn't require I take on a man and his luggage. Look I know we all come with baggage and I'm cool with that. But some of these dudes out here need to be at the airport, they have professionals working in that luggage claim game and are far more better at it than I. 

No I don't want a dude who has kids. I'm competing in a competition for his love and affection when I'm going to be the loser by default. He may not be a daddy to his kids. But I'll always be a second priority up against his kids. Plus I don't wanna compete with an ex or baby's mother. Like no. Keep that Brady Bunch Circus bullshit over there with you. I'm not interested in applying not even watching the show. Then this whole selfishness is crazy! You gotta have sex with him when he wants, gotta go out when he wants, gotta go piss when he wants, gotta go to work when he wants, keeps his money, doesn't want to help pay bills or for dates or even buy you a $1 store trinket. WHAT ARE YOU GOOD FOR?? You're selfish ass needs to be at home with your momma!! She the only who's gonna tolerate that dumb shit. Unless it's a stupid female. I may be blonde but I'm far from being stupid. Like they're stuck in this child thought process where a woman has to take care of them for the rest of their lives. Yes I understand that's how you grew up. But don't claim the man role if you're not going to be a man. The man is the provider, protector and the head of the family. But when you forsake those things then you're not a man you're fucking little ass kid. A grown one that needs a serious adjustment as soon as possible. 

However there are men who got their heads on straight and want to be that man. But they've married the wrong women, they're gay......or lately what I've encountered they're fucking confused. These are the men who have no kids, no crazy exes, has a decent job, own house (no apartment), own car and is like dreamboat of all sexual fantasies. However he's also the one who'll string you along, never text back, is always busy, or always has some lame excuse, he's just down right weird. Some are even grieving an ex, others are looking for greener pastures (like that'll ever happen) or sitting somewhere sulking and whining about being lonely and single. Like what besides killing myself for your attention should I hop in front of a moving bus while singing zippity-do-dah?? I feel that way with my current boo. After not talking to him (on his own accords) from December. He pops the hell up outta nowhere a week or two before my birthday last month and acts like nothing has happen. Or like those 4ish months were like two days or something. And I haven't seen him since my birthday. Last I talked to him he was angry because I was ranting about being hit on by guys and I don't know if he felt jealous or like e was in competition or what. Before that he was too busy to text me. But was blowing me the hell up when I was busy. You see that?? I shan't bother you whilst you're busy but fuck when I'm busy I better pick up the phone and be available right then and there for sex. Like get the fuck outta here with that bullshit. 

I'm tired of having the same result. You meet a guy, they all ask me the same dumb ass questions. 

•You married?? Gotta Boyfriend?? Or What??

•You got kids??

•Who/where you stay with/at?? 

Then it's like BAM—here's several selfies of my dick. I wanna fuck your raw and lick your toes and all this weird shit. 

Then when I voice I'm not interested. I've apparently wasted his time and how I'll regret it later because I'm losing out on the best opportunity that would ever bless me in my life EVER. Um, no. I think I'll be alright. I'm not looking for anyone. For the record hot pants you approached me. I had no interest from the get go just by looking at the dumb shit you post on your page and the vulgarity that comes out of your mouth. Plus you sporting your kids like they're accessories is a major turn off. Don't let some wild ass thot come outta nowhere and try to intimidate you on some dumb shit because she thinks you want her #MCM. Like bitch no, don't nobody want him but you. Hell he needs a Nobel peace prize for giving you a time of day!! 

This whole presumption of me being desperate for a man or giving off mixed singnals is crazy. Like please! I'm honest. It might be brutal, but I keep it 100. If I say I'm not interested from the get go don't get mad, be appreciative I didn't waste yours or mine time. I had a dude do that to me last year. For whole ass season dude had me thinking we were gonna hook up and be something. Then he dropped the dumbest shit I ever heard in my life. Saying he couldn't be with me because I've had previous sexual partners and that was going to mess up his relationship with his daughter (whom he rarely saw anyway and lived at least 15hours away). Like what?? Here I am falling in love with you, ready to pack my crap and move closer to you and start something. And he drops that shit in my lap, unfriended me and delete my number. Yet I happen upon his Facebook and he wrote this status about he likes this girl and wishes she'd move closer to him and how he doesn't wanna be single and all this shit (the same shit he said to me) well she ended up dissing his ass he tried to play it off. But here I am willing to do that and you tell me I'm not good enough. 

I think that's why I don't want a relationship. When you invest time into someone it's hard to move on to someone else. It's like going back to school to be tormented all over again. Or having to replace your order at a fast food joint because someone else fucked up. So I spend 4 or 6 months basically auditioning to be a girlfriend and I never get the chance because you've already assumed that there's someone else better than me or you believe there IS some else better than me. But you wanna fuck up my world and then kick me to the curb but as soon as I pick up all my pieces and glue myself back together here you come again to fuck it up all over again. It's like why?? You know you have no interest in investing a future with me or see me being more than just one of your part time fuck buddies. Like why, though?? But then if I see through your bullshit earlier on then you're mad at me because I'm not going to stand for it. No I'm not giving you my number, you're not gonna be stalking me or phone sexing me every time you get a chance or sending me pics of your dick. No I'm not telling you where I live so you can dew drop in when you feel like it. No I'm not going to allow you to make an assumption of me and not stand up for myself. And no I don't wanna hear how you think your different from all the other guys in the world yet your on that same fuck boy bullshit. 

No. 

I honestly would rather be single for my entire life span than to constantly allow men to come into my life and break me down until I'm useless, nothing and irreparable. No. I'm sorry. I can't allow that to happen. And I won't. I care too much about myself to allow that to happen. 

So in other words. No I'm not "thirsty" and I never will be. And if you're gonna assume anything.....assume I'm a lesbian. Just leave me be. My time is precious to me and I won't be wasting it anymore. 

The Origins Of Sex Toys & Lube

I came across this article a few weeks ago and knew just by the title it was something that I wanted to include for Condom Week this year. The Origins of Sex Toys and Lube.

To me Lube seems to be a modern thing, I always wondered what they did in the hay day even way before Vaseline was invented. I wouldn't've guessed that they used olive oil as a lubricant. Not saying it's bad and I've heard it does wonders for the skin, I can only say what it does for my hair lol.

However going through the 10 item list of awesomeness, I can't help but giggle at how sex toys and lube got their mark on the world. Usually by accident but the next surprising thing is how many YEARS ago this all happened! Forget 70's porn, this is the naughty stuff your great-great grandma refuses to talk about. And I don't blame her lol.

I Foresee My Kittens Doing This One Day

Confessional, Much?

Gung Hay Fat Choy!!

Even though I'm pretty sad to see the year of snake go, I'm slight excited about the Chinese New Year this year. 

However I don't know many things that relate to horses or similar topics. So we'll make it the year of the pony lol. 

This year is a lot different. I decided to cook something good for New Years which turned out great! And I'm very happy and pleased with my hard work. I found a recipe for Pineapple Orange chicken about a week or two ago and decided that I would cook that for the new year. So I went out and got my chicken and supplies. I ended up cheating because since I'm not a cooker and not cooking inclined. I cheated. So I just cooked the chicken and veggies and used a sweet and sour chicken recipe starter pack by Kraft. Which I must say is worth the $4! However it made it easier and made me very happy. Plus it spared me buying things I didn't need or were just going to use just for this one recipe. Since it was only me, I ended up with servings of 8 anyway. Definitely don't want to be stuck with something for weeks regardless if it taste good or not. 

Unlike last year, I'm more about me this time. Because of taking care of my mom the stress of that and trying to be a responsible adult collided plus the stomach flu made it worse. This time I have a good frame of mind and I can focus my time on building myself into a better person literally. I'm no young filly, even though I wish I was. However I'm going to try my best and be the best "pony" I can be. I think within the last year I've learned a lot about acceptance and that I won't be able to please everyone's expectations including my own. However I will still continue to do my best and work as hard as I can. Even with my 3 jobs haha (the joke is I don't have a 1st one yet lol). 

I hope this year will be better and that I can better myself so much or even just a smidgen to the point I can marvel at my own growth. 

So I wish you all a Happy Chinese New Year. Let's both hope this is a better year than the last. 

Never Have I

I was thinking on this subject and it didn't really hit me or maybe sink in until yesterday when I was doing something in the kitchen.

Never have I in my life experienced the whole wondrous moment of when a man fawns over a woman. Like you know how guys say how he couldn't take his eyes off her or how he knew she was the one the second she smiled or giggled at his lame joke. I've never gotten the chance to be put on such a pedestal and be admired in such a way. Or so I thought.

The more I thought about it, then I realized I did get that chance. By Him-Who-Shall-Remain-Nameless, he put me on that pedestal and I loved every single moment of being there. I felt like a forgotten princess that had finally be found by unlikely prince and how happy I was to finally be admired. Unfortunately it didn't last long and it turned out to be for a selfish reason not of my own accord and he fucked it up for me big time. I guess that's why I can't fully get over him. He stole some really precious moments away from me and ruined my whole outlook on everything else. Even though I say I'm over it and partially act like I am...deep down I'm really not. Honestly if I had never met him or never gone outside that day or never even spent the years to follow getting to know him. I think I would be in a better mind frame, and the stuff to follow his foolishness wouldn't've happened and I think I would have a more positive outlook on relationships and love.

The funniest thing happened today, another girl on Facebook mentioned how she's never celebrated Valentine's Day let alone been on a real date. For the first time in my life I felt like I wasn't the only queer in the world. I'm not saying I enjoyed what I read but I felt so much better knowing it's not just me. It's one thing to be told it's not you and never see anything to provide accurate proof oppose to actually seeing proof and not feeling like a total outcast jackass. I think she's really nice, and as a good personality.

It makes me wonder, how does a woman go majority of her life not knowing what it's like to be treated like a princess or to have a man fawn over you like you're the only woman in the world. How is that possible?? I can't believe there are so few men and those not taken by ruthless cougars and skanks are gay. Something happened along the way that made the woman's love life take a wrong detour and it can't seem to get back on the right track. But if it's somewhat common, why is it considered weird or strange for a woman to be single longer than her counterparts who are married or with children?? Why above all else does she get penalized or reprimanded for it?? The whole logic behind it baffles me.

Then again like the saying goes, just because you're a good woman doesn't mean you'll be good enough for a man who isn't ready. You'll never be good enough. So then my next question is how long must a woman wait to be good enough?? How long must she put her life on hold and work a simple daily routine until he's ready to "man-up" and take her out or date her or have a relationship with her?? It's strange really.

Yet even now as I write this, other than Him, I can't recall a guy genuinely liking me for me and putting me on that princess pedestal and making me his whole world. Never. I won't lie and say it never bothered me, but I also won't say that I let it consume me. Eventually I learned to get over it and move on, even if it was hard and difficult and my feelings got hurt along the way. I'm assuming it must be a nice experience and quite pleasant. However I doubt I'll ever know what it's like, so I won't spend too much of my time wasting hoping such a thing to happen. But never say never says the ones who never spent their entire life single lol.

Definitely Not A Fan

Generational Misconduct

New Year Resolutions

70's Karate Chop: Alternative

A few months ago I posted a video I found on Facebook. 

Well I just found the alternative version that it just as entertaining check it out.

I Feel So...

I know I should be sleep but after thinking about tonight, I lost the urge to do so. I went to visit my aunt. But while I was there I felt so left out. Like almost inadequate. It's like everyone else knows a secret and you don't and you're just the background noise to the conversation that's being spoken in tongue in front if you. 

While I'm laying here it made me realize why I want to be alone. I don't like that inadequacy feeling. That "left-out" permanently feeling. It bugs the shit out me and I don't like it. It gives me too many emotions to try and handle and I don't like it because in the end I end up frustrated, hurt and confused. 

I personally and honestly feel that if I alienate myself from all people I won't have to deal with that feeling. I can be contented if I want to or even mad or sad or whatever feeling I'm experiencing at the moment. Plus I don't know how to interact with people. No matter how hard I try to, I always find myself just sitting and smiling and putting up a front like I'm really happy to be participating but in actuality I'm not, I'm uncomfortable, anxious and....lost. Because I don't know what to say and I know the people I'm closest to I have nothing in common with them so a conversation becomes difficult or just down right boring. Or in some cases, it becomes nothing at all but awkward silence. 

The restlessness that shrouds my bitter heart feels like when you can't swallow and it's so hard that nothing works. When I get like this I just want to run away and be a forgotten memory. It makes me wish for death....

However. Having my little kitten, makes life worth while for me. We may have our misunderstandings somedays but I'm happy to have him. He makes me happy and appreciated me for what kindness I show him, loves me without judgement and the best part about it all for the first time I've got someone who's afraid to lose me. Someone who's even afraid to see me leave. That by far is the best thing that's ever happened to me. I love every single moment I get to spend with him. Nothing else matters. But I also know and I've come to understand that interacting with humans will soon come to a close. I think after this party I begin to spend the remainder of my life alone with Hawthorn and leave it at that. Hopefully if things go the way I hope, I won't have to leave the house too often and me and him can always be together. I also know it won't last forever. One day we're both going to end up at death's doors going to another place. Sooner or later it doesn't matter to me. Because he'd be the only one to miss me and I for him as well. 

I can honestly say, this is the first time I ever felt so emotional. 

The Flea Market

Hi kids!

I know it's been awhile since I talked to you guys and dolls. But I thought since I'm here with nothing to do I can type up something, even if it's a quickie. 

So in the midst of cleaning out my parents home so I can move in, I have tons of stuff that my mom brought that I can't use and have no need for. My uncle suggested that I sale them to make a little bit of money. Which is a wonderful idea. However I must say I wasn't expecting the flea market to be so difficult and just down right strange. Even though this a my first time I must say that I really don't like this too much. 

I'm not knocking it. I just never had an interest in it. Being here and trying sale something to people who expect to get it for nothing is beyond a challenge to me. In my case I never was much of a sales person and advertising and sales and all that business and financial side of things definitely ain't my forte. Therefore I do great unpacking boxes, placing things or even putting things like shoes on display. That I do good at. Trying to attract people and show them that my salt and pepper shakers are better than the woman in row C column 8's is like the most frustrating task to me and I personally don't have the patience to deal with it. That's just me. Like everyone shops differently and values things differently. That I understand. But I can't think for someone just like they can't do the same about me. 

Baffling experience really. I think the only plus is that they have funnel cake and that I have a close parking spot. I dunno we'll see how it goes within the next few hours. Plus I miss my little Hawthorn too. I rather be fussing and fighting with him instead of sitting in the cold with a newborn cold trying to kill me off lol. 

Bunny's Corner: The Midnight Tirade

So my aunt and uncle are going away to visit old friends of his and their spouse. Something they do about every year or so. I was aware of it and understood they would be living to catch their flight in the middle of the night basically. Unfortunately my kitten, Hawthorn, was unusually hyper and excited about this.  

Anyway so I'm sleep and Hawthorn is running a muck like he received Mad Hatter training from Johnny Depp. He was making a whole hell of a lot of noise and running around. The jingle bells on his neck doesn't make it any better. In the midst of whatever the game it was he was playing he decides to pounce on my feet and body because I'm under the covers because I'm cold. Then I had to discipline him with a squirt from the naughty bottle and a spank on the hip. 

So I then put him in bed with me and told him to lay it down. I turned off the light so he could understand its bed time like always. No, no. What does he do?? Tries to chew my necklace off which I decided to squirt him about since nose bopping and spanks weren't working. Let's say my bed ended up damp. But that wasn't the worst part it was the fact that he decided to shake the water off that killed the mood faster than a broken solitary condom with a hottie. He did this twice. In addition to running around crazily and acting like, well like.....like a complete douchewaffle. 

So then when I thought I could lay it down and go back to dreaming about sugar plums and all that other good shit. My aunt says we need you to move the car so we can go plus hurry up we're late. Now mind you I'm not going and basically she's the one who's late. Go figure huh. So I go and move the car in my sleepy death like state. When I come back in thinking I could sleep. Oh no no no. I couldn't because Hawthorn knocked his food bowl over and I had to clean up which depreciated my want to sleep ever more. Thus I went to the bathroom and grab something cold to drink. 

By time I made it to bed. Hawthorn climbed up in my lap and went to sleep. He's actually on his third nap as I type this. The worst part is I have things to do but I'm far too tired and I'm a bit too agitated to do so. Plus apparently my lap makes a wonderful napping location too. Oh woe is Bunny!! 

Pirate Party

Source

Jealousy

I never once thought that as an adult that others would let jealousy consume them to the point of childishness. I never let that cross my mind. Yeah sure I knew it happened in high school and even in college. But in the world of adulthood and responsibility?? Nah only if and when a love triangle is involved. Apparently I was wrong and assumed way too much.

My family has been going hot and cold on me about my mother's passing. My one set of aunt and uncle believe I'm a total fuck up and how I'm not putting in the effort to move back into the house or how I need to get a job asap and do this and how I shouldn't have brought my kitten (you can read more about him here) to how I'm not being responsible enough to "handle business" when they're basically bulldozing me over to do it first and not giving me the opportunity to be the adult they demand me to be. While my other aunt and uncle whom I currently live with are fine, I'm personally tired of the rules but I appreciate them helping me and treating me like an adult. Plus they don't have a problem with my having a kitten either. But I never thought people well into their 50s, 60s and 70s could bicker, argue and be so petty. The main reason is jealousy.

I understand that at my current situation I'm 26, I [sort of] own a house, and a car and never worked an actual job in my life. For some people that bothers them. I can understand that. I'm jealous everyone else gets to share many more years or the best years of their lives with their parents and families. However to get mad about it and try to find a faulty reasoning behind it, is ridiculous. I didn't ask to be in this situation, honestly I rather not have the house or car. I rather have more time with my parents, not for holidays or family time or gatherings—but just because.

What's even worst is the fact that jealousy brings out the ugliness in people. Some know it and others are in denial of it. My uncle got mad because the dining room has a motion sensor light switch, his wife is still going on about my cat and how I need to get my money back because he's a mutt. What may seem valueless or unnecessary to you doesn't mean that's true for everyone else.

I'm not saying we as humans should never be jealous, we have that as a right. Just like we're allowed to be mad, sad, happy or overwhelmed. Those emotions are our right as human beings. I'm jealous of people who have parents, or those who have their own families or even idiots who graduated college but I'm not going to take my anger out on them. I'm allowed to voice how I feel for my own personal reasons, but what's the point of me pitching a bitch. It won't change anything nor is my situation going to change. In their case, it won't rewrite the past to make your present and future any better. That's not how things work.

Unfortunately I don't like this situation and all the unnecessary emotional unbalances of other people. Nor do I like other people telling me how I'm suppose to be feeling. But what can you do when people let the jealousy bring out the envious ugliness of their soul?? Most say sit back and watch them make a fool of themselves. Sometimes, that's easier said than done.

70's Karate Chop

One of my Facebook friends shared this video and I did to but I had to come and share it with you guys and dolls. By far the funniest yet most awesomenest thing I've seen in a long time. 

I don't care what anyone says, the 70's rocked!! By the way men were sexy as all get out with them bell bottms on OH MY GOODNESS what happened?? lol

1-800-SEARCH-ME

Graphic Source

When it comes to Search Engine Optimization, I know I'm not the only person in the world who get's the gist of it but has no clue what the hell it's really about all-in-one. Now I can honestly say I've gotten a lot more involved with it since I began blogging more and wanting to attract a bigger audience and broaden my out reach. However in the beginning it didn't mean anything to me and I posted what I want and continued my lousy job as a so-called blogger.

It wasn't until I decided to get back into blogging and I noticed that one post I did in my attempts before to make some money via online, that it became a success. The funny thing about the Rockabye post is that not only did I not know what I was writing about, but I half assed the post. I didn't research or go find out, I just wrote something. It's kind of sad in a way but what I couldn't understand then is why is this post more popular than all my other posts?? Especially all of those I put a lot of time, hard work and damn good effort in? I didn't know and couldn't figure it out, why? I knew nothing about it.  So I decided to research the topic and see exactly what it was I acted like I knew tons about. I did.

But I also felt bad because I had created a lousy post on something I didn't take time to research and kind of left it out there hanging in the air with a broken URL link and no other information to go along with it. I took the time out to try to correct it as much as possible. Within this process, started something even better, I not only fixed it to the best of my abilities but I also was able to give the people who liked the post a reason to come back via the Rockabye Deals. Also around the same time, blogger had updated there system and added a "search description" which at first made some sense but then on the same token it didn't. However I soon caught on that this was to attract readers to your site via SEO. I suck at that lol. I instead give a short summary that's long enough to still be found when someone searches for something. Now there are many ways and reasons people use SEO to their advantage and some are very successful at pulling in an audience that way. Then there are some people who use it with the full intention of doing so for their advantage but instead turn it into a disadvantage unintentionally. In this case, many bloggers who want to be heard or seen has mad many mistakes when it comes to using SEO.

I personally say it's a curse and a blessing at the same time. When you get really involved and take time out to use keywords, some of the words aren't very post friendly and if you focus on many topics like I do, or a specific topic like make up or latch-hooking or why pornography is a lucrative career, the keyword "car" isn't going to help your page and it'll be a fruitless effort to make it work. I'm just saying. It reminds me of a royal, snobbish-snooty hashtag. This site gives a good description on those who use SEO. Which is the truth, and I agree with it. However I can say it has been very helpful in my getting more people to visit my blog from all parts of the world. Thus meeting new people, and hopefully in the process having subscribers and a more popular blog....someday. However everything requires baby steps, and sometimes that's better because you can turn something you thought would be better into something even greater.

The Mirrored Clock

So my parents had this huge diamond shaped mirror clock in the living room. It's a beautiful clock and also very rare. However it's gotten rusted and a few of the metal piece numbers have popped off. 

I considered restoring it because it's such a nice clock, art—hell even a conversation piece beyond its time. However finding metal pieces similar to the ones on there has been more than just difficult. I've looked everywhere and can't find it. If I do come across something it's either sold out or out of stock be then I'm wondering what the fuck kind of craft stores are these??? 

I've decided for now I'll use smaller mirror piece, some gold glitter and make it work until I find what I'm looking for. Even finding replacement clock parts was a bitch. Hopefully I can get it restored and looking nice before it goes back up on the wall. 

It strikes me as odd that there is no other clock like that. And very little mirror clocks available. I dunno. Its been a strange last few weeks anyway lol. 

Blue Bunnies Go Vroom, Vroom

So whilst I was kicking it with the Auntie today and watching Judge Mathis with her. Judge Mathis was handling this one case where the woman was suing her "one night stand boyfriend" roommates over lost of personal property and whatever else that was silly. So it was mentioned that she was homeless and living out of her car. So then later they start talking about a few missing items and then she said some one took her sex toy. So the roommates said they didn't take it and how she took it with her back to her car. Well the bailiff makes this joke about the sex toy being plugged into the car cigarette lighter. As they giggled on the TV like little kids I couldn't help but wonder if there was such an invention and thus you know me I had to go and google that subject because I wanted to know!!


Low and behold guess what I find! 

This awesome article on TrendHunter about the Rabbit Travel Vibe. YES it plugs into the car outlet (they were called cigarrette lighter outlets when I was a kid lol). HA! Go figure right?! Unfortunately the link the author had for you to purchase it was a dead end. Thus I went on an adventure to search for it and found it on Amazon for $18 plus the $5 shipping fee (also found it here and found a review on it here). I'm like hot damn! But now I have to wonder, does someone actually own one of these and uses it while driving?? I would think that would be a bit dangerous--in all seriousness. Or maybe that's the way you charge it, you think?? Well here's the kicker, it's not a dildo or a traditional vibrator where you insert it in the vagina. It's more of a bullet. Imagine the Rabbit Vibrator, minus the penis part. I guess it could be fun and quite interesting especially if you're in a lone parking lot by yourself or with your hunny and wanted to get some quick action lol.

I personally love the color and love that it's a Bunny lol. I think it's a fabulous idea, even better than wooden dildos!

Tell me would any of you buy this and keep it in the glove compartment??