Jealousy

I never once thought that as an adult that others would let jealousy consume them to the point of childishness. I never let that cross my mind. Yeah sure I knew it happened in high school and even in college. But in the world of adulthood and responsibility?? Nah only if and when a love triangle is involved. Apparently I was wrong and assumed way too much.

My family has been going hot and cold on me about my mother's passing. My one set of aunt and uncle believe I'm a total fuck up and how I'm not putting in the effort to move back into the house or how I need to get a job asap and do this and how I shouldn't have brought my kitten (you can read more about him here) to how I'm not being responsible enough to "handle business" when they're basically bulldozing me over to do it first and not giving me the opportunity to be the adult they demand me to be. While my other aunt and uncle whom I currently live with are fine, I'm personally tired of the rules but I appreciate them helping me and treating me like an adult. Plus they don't have a problem with my having a kitten either. But I never thought people well into their 50s, 60s and 70s could bicker, argue and be so petty. The main reason is jealousy.

I understand that at my current situation I'm 26, I [sort of] own a house, and a car and never worked an actual job in my life. For some people that bothers them. I can understand that. I'm jealous everyone else gets to share many more years or the best years of their lives with their parents and families. However to get mad about it and try to find a faulty reasoning behind it, is ridiculous. I didn't ask to be in this situation, honestly I rather not have the house or car. I rather have more time with my parents, not for holidays or family time or gatherings—but just because.

What's even worst is the fact that jealousy brings out the ugliness in people. Some know it and others are in denial of it. My uncle got mad because the dining room has a motion sensor light switch, his wife is still going on about my cat and how I need to get my money back because he's a mutt. What may seem valueless or unnecessary to you doesn't mean that's true for everyone else.

I'm not saying we as humans should never be jealous, we have that as a right. Just like we're allowed to be mad, sad, happy or overwhelmed. Those emotions are our right as human beings. I'm jealous of people who have parents, or those who have their own families or even idiots who graduated college but I'm not going to take my anger out on them. I'm allowed to voice how I feel for my own personal reasons, but what's the point of me pitching a bitch. It won't change anything nor is my situation going to change. In their case, it won't rewrite the past to make your present and future any better. That's not how things work.

Unfortunately I don't like this situation and all the unnecessary emotional unbalances of other people. Nor do I like other people telling me how I'm suppose to be feeling. But what can you do when people let the jealousy bring out the envious ugliness of their soul?? Most say sit back and watch them make a fool of themselves. Sometimes, that's easier said than done.